L David H Hubel

L    David H Hubel



How is it that the brighter of our lot
Can not but help to walk right off a ledge?
Presented with the politicians' rot,
Emotions, not their intellect, has edge.

To raw beginners, learned men do pledge
Their reputations on mere change and hope.
Then comes the commie from his hiding hedge.
The emeritus now becomes the dope!

Endorsement lists are but a slippery slope,
For some are learned--some are quite insane.
Because of him, in darkness we now grope.
I think reductionism was your bane.

Was it the global warming scam you bought?
Look in Obama's eyes.  The truth lies not!

IL D J R Bruckner

IL     D J R Bruckner



I found a folded New York Times today;
I thought I'd see if it were truth or pap.
I flipped it open--what had it to say?
A fish head fell out, "plop," into my lap!

So stained it was with guts and parrot crap;
(They'd used it for the bottom of the cage)
To see Pelosi's picture used like that,
The editors would fly into a rage.

Oh!  There was poop and blood on every page;
So intermixed with all the liberal views.
This mess did simply not my mind engage!
I washed my hands and bought a Daily News.

To see a sacred forum used this way,
Reminds me of the Times in Bruckner's day.

XLVIII Marshall Berman

XLVIII    Marshall Berman



Oh!  All this Marxist bull!  It makes me sick!
The commie manifesto makes me puke!
We've put twelve men upon the moon, you prick!
And all were taught by grandmas.  'Twas no fluke!

American success you do rebuke;
As if our excellence was got by chance;
You're not intelligentia!  You're a kook!
I wouldn't give Karl Marx a second glance.

And while you smugly danced the liberal dance;
The world was built by people in the know;
Of course you'd never once reverse your stance;
So to irrelevancy you must go.

Your communes don't produce a man of spunk.
At crunch-time, when he's needed, he'll be drunk.

XLVII Jean Anyon

XLVII    Jean Anyon



Now everybody knows, who's in the biz;
That education's naught to do with race.
There's some who are a most terrific whiz;
And others who fall flat upon their face.

When rediscovered answers you do chase,
You're bound to stumble onto old Karl Marx.
When what's between your learners you erase,
Your prototypes will not discover quarks,

A dog that goes "meow"; a cat that barks;
Is not an innovation for us, Jean.
So keep to self your communist remarks;
And let us build the national machine.

We don't need fancy NYU degrees;
My grandma used to teach the ABC's.

XLVI Rochus Misch

XLVI    Rochus Misch



I wonder how that Nazi bunker smelled;
The maniacs alive yet in their graves;
Whilst Lugers to each others' heads they held.
You were the last of Fuhrerbunker's knaves.

Just you and Goebbels, marching 'round like slaves;
You watched them kill their children in their beds;
Egomaniacy the mind depraves.
Why did you not shoot Hitler in the head?

It's true, of course, you would have wound up dead,
But could have made your martyrdom sublime.
I guess your death, to you, was quite a dread.
You could have killed him at an earlier time.

You didn't try to do what heroes do.
So are the Goebbels children haunting you?

XLV Abu Mansoor Al-Amriki

XLV    Abu Mansoor Al-Amriki



You were from Alabama, of all things!
A high school nut case; college dropout, too;
Toronto girl and you exchanged two rings;
Abandoned her and child--out of the blue.

Is honest living not enough for you?
You made the FBI most wanted list;
Why bother marrying wife number two?
To leave her for your Muslim jihad tryst?

Upon your family you were just a cyst;
Dinsoor, Somalia was your Waterloo;
No better than a stinking Bolshevist;
And now your jihad's made an end of you.

A bullet took you for a rocket ride.
You should have stayed and cheered the Crimson Tide.

XLIV Saul Landau

SLIV    Saul Landau



I had a Matthews-moment with Fidel;
A thrill went up my leg when he touched me;
And now I'm started on my way to Hell;
With all the other sychophants you see;

When you watch CBS or NBC;
Or read the Post or tune in PBS;
The editors are laughing in their brie;
Who gets their kudos, you can surely guess.

'Een though our dear old country's in a mess,
We ought to follow Castro's proven route.
So put a biased muzzle on the press,
For that's what communism's all about!

If Cuba's so advanced as Landau says,
How come they couldn't save poor old Chavez?

XLIII Ariel Castro

XLIII    Ariel Castro



No little mermaid.  Not this Ariel.
A serial kidnapper.  Rapist, too.
An animal like him, the truth to tell
Belongs not in our midst, but in a zoo.

Too bad the government is watching you
Instead of guys like him as they should be.
He voted for Obama, it is true!
I didn't.  So now they are watching me.

Our efforts are misplaced, I hate to say.
They give the guns to men like Castro there;
To use, so they can blame the NRA;
And take away your right to keep and bear.

He hung himself inside his cell today.
No worries.  He'll be voting anyway.

XLII Bruce Dunning

XLII    Bruce Dunning



Oh! What a crock, the views of CBS!
And what a lot of bunk they try to push.
The world according to old Hermann Hesse;
And manufactured dirt about George Bush.

About Obama's failure?  "Hush, man!  Hush!"
His choreographed assault upon the truth.
The Tea Party is who we have to crush;
So bring the 'tards to the election booth.

Our re-election strategy's uncouth;
The bullying and lying every day;
All the joy of an impacted tooth
For four more years is heading right your way.

Ask Brian Terry's parents of their son.
They'll tell you, "Eric Holder!  He's the one!"

XLI Zvonko Busic

XLI    Zvonko Busic



Remember Trans World Airlines 3-5-5?
Zvonko Busic commandeered that flight.
They all were lucky to remain alive
In Paris when they landed late that night.

The pressure cooker filled with gelignite
Exploded, leaving Brian Murray dead.
Zvonko gave up, acting quite contrite;
Spent thirty-two long seasons in the "shed".

They let him go, and from that "joint" he fled;
The notice in the papers was quite small.
'Twas suicide--by gunshot to the head!
Contrition has its price tag after all.

The dollar bill still reads "In God We Trust";
Another lib'ral hero bites the dust.

XL Dick Thien

XL    Dick Thien



Roberto Unger said it best, I think;
Obama's law professor, that was he.
"Defeat him!"  Unger said, "His efforts stink!"
"He's a filthy commie!"  (That was me).

The bad job numbers were his fault, you see;
I din't read that in USA Today;
He gives the lowlifes cash and drugs for free;
And gives the working stiffs the bills to pay.

I founded that newspaper, by the way;
But by and large I guess it's full of crap.
I didn't think the right should have their say;
And now I'm down for my perpetual nap.

Although I helped them pass their health care laws,
I died at 73 from "natural cause".

XXXIX Lew Wood

XXXIX    Lew Wood



CBS and NBC--what rot!
Don't turn to us expecting to get news;
We puff the libs--we give it all we've got;
And spike the stuff promoting other views.

Forget Obama's billion dollar cruise;
You didn't hear it here on NBC.
The DNC give us our "don'ts" and "do's";
So blame the leaks on Fox but not on me.

We're going to have a nanny state. You'll see.
If liberty went rampant, who could guess?
There might be someone out there rich as me;
Who didn't get his facts from CBS.

So as us demogogues do slowly die;
A newbie takes our places by-and-by.

XXXVIII Jack Germond

XXXVIII    Jack Germond



"We've got to help the masses see the light!"
That's what we tell each other over drinks.
We pound the propaganda day and night
To make them think the way Obama thinks.

The job prognostication simply stinks;
And everybody's life is on the line;
The White House press corps--full of rotten finks!
I want that corner office to be mine.

So have another glass of summer wine;
And drink the Kool-Aide like the others did;
On Uncle Sam's cadaver we will dine;
Ah!  Quid pro quo becomes our pro quo quid!

Yes, Stalin tried, but simply lost his way.
Perhaps Karl Marx's day will be today.

XXXVII William Lynch, Jr.

XXXVII    William Lynch, Jr.



I managed four campaigns for President;
For Walter Mondale and Ted Kennedy;
But that accounts for only losers two.
'Twas Jesse Jackson that lost twice you see!

The "rumpled genius" they labeled me,
'Een though I cast my fate with hapless fools.
I worked New York for shoo-in Hillary
Not knowing that her tears would fall in pools!

Barack Obama came and broke the rules
Pretending not to know it was her turn
To win the joust 'tween elepants and mules.
Election night I watched her future burn.

I wonder why they thought I was so wise...
The contests were all won by other guys!

XXXVI John Palmer

XXXVI    John Palmer



I didn't bother telling you some stuff;
You didn't hear a thing on NBC;
Obama's making finding jobs real tough;
Outspent the last five presidents, I see.

I've got my liberal journalist degree;
I hang with Bryant Gumbel and the bunch;
And when I'm finished smiling on TV,
I try to take Jane Pauley out to lunch.

I liked my biased editors a bunch;
They had such nuanced socialistic views;
They really helped when I was in a crunch;
To read my talking points and spin the news.

We blamed a lot on W!  Too much!
Cause he's the reason that I smoked too much!

XXXV Herb Kaplow

XXXV    Herb Kaplow



Oh my!  A vision just crept through my mind;
The stories that we spiked, the lies we told;
The spin; our propaganda so unkind;
The commie manifesto must be sold!

Just blame the socialistic views we hold;
We dast not e'er elect a patriot.
The new Amerika will be so bold!
We don't care what a cur or pimp we've got.

Don't tell the Clintons their curse you've forgot;
For they've not gone away, nor ever will.
Now they're on easy street, just doing pot;
And everybody's paying for it still.

A creepy job I had.  It's over now.
But Hillary is still a sacred cow.

XXXIV Vince Casanova

XXXIV    Vince Casanova



Your biased papers spread the commie word;
Poor judgment rivaling the movie stars;
Neglecting all the horrid things you heard;
And catering to the lowlifes in the bars.

Our Lady Liberty still bears your scars;
From all the crappy leftist things you wrote;
Promoting failure; undermining wars;
And making our true statesmen look like goats.

On mediocrity there is no ship that floats,
We won't be missing all your bankrupt rags;
Your stomach reels from lies and now it bloats!
The doctors cannot help--go pack your bags!

Oh!  Did we tell you that you were a loon?
And your "new house" is simply a commune.

XXXIII Helen Thomas

XXXIII    Helen Thomas



Yes, I was THE most biased in the news!
A true distinction!  I was number one.
And always slanting toward my liberal views;
And skewering good statesmen, just for fun.

I never got Obama on the run,
Although I recognized his statist ways.
Sev'n weeks without a question from this Hun.
Oh heck!  Why not just go with what he says?

Now I have ne'er been one of those who prays,
Though death has made me contemplate the term;
I didn't really care about the gays;
I liked to watch the Jesus freakers squirm.

The White House press corps misses me, it's true.
I helped them make a mockery of you!

XXXII Sabawi Ibrahim al-Tikriti

XXXII    Sabawi Ibrahim al-Tikriti



You were Saddam's half-brother.  My regrets.
The six of diamonds in the terror deck;
But Dubya took your dealer in straight sets;
And hung another brother by the neck.

The leader of the secret service!  Yecccch!
Imagine working for that evil man;
Procudring wine and women for that drek.
Pretending that you were his biggest fan.

Another brother yet is in the can,
Awaiting death, his hanging date unknown.
Oh!  What a family of turds you ran.
In mis'ry and deceit your genes were sown.

You thought you'd be a martyr, but alas!
You died of cancer, just another ass.

XXXI William H Gray

XXXI    William H Gray



Oh what a hipocrite I was, my friends;
To lie and cheat and steal right in your face.
The stink of the corruption never ends;
Leon Panetta had to take my place.

But he and Bonior didn't have the grace
To let poor Pennsylvania have a chance
For government without abject disgrace;
Detached from graft and sin; corruption's dance.

So round the dem convention we all prance;
And on and on we cheat until we die;
And then we wonder, fixed beneath God's glance;
Why we dare not look him in the eye.

Attorney General Thornburg cut my deal.
Or I'd continued on to lie and steal.

XXX Byron Looper

XXX  Byron Looper



Monopoly on sin, the Dems ain't got.
Now here's a guy who shot his rival dead
And left his body in a parking lot;
A bullet wound placed squarely in his head.

He'd changed his name to "no tax", someone said.
As other hopefuls, since, have also done.
If Clinton changed his name from Mill to Fred,
He'd hope that we'd forget the smoking gun.

But Byron, like our Bill, knew once he'd won
Election, all the rest he could control.
The media pitching in to have some fun
With all his made-up virtues to extol.

The problem was that Bill was in his groove,
But Looper was not even half as smooth.

XXIX Marc Rich

XXIX    Marc Rich



What scumbags we elect from time to time;
(And I'm afraid we've done it 'een once more)
Harassing interns on the public dime
And treating his first lady like a whore.

Attempts at statesmanship are just a bore
For those that have the criminal intent.
There's money, sex--illicit things to score!
And, later on, he wondered where it went.

Rich crooks like you, to Bill, were heaven-sent.
Considering all to whom that bastard lied,
His sins were much the larger in extent.
Methinks betwixt you two, the wrong one died.

Send Bill a million, Hillary as well,
And see if they can pardon you from hell.

XXVIII William Hathaway

XXVIII    William Hathaway



Back in the nineties William had the gall
(Bill Clinton and Algore corrupt), he preached
Tom Dash-hole should be Prez if they should fall.
Thank God that no agreement could be reached!

For if today, because our trust is breached;
Minority succession were the rule,
Obama and Joe Biden, once impeached;
Our president would be a senile fool!

What perverse thoughts did pis forth from this ghoul.
A nanny-state from hell, he'd liked to make.
Ideas hatched, at night, in "liberal school".
Our will reversed!  For socialism's sake!

We're better off with this idea dead.
Let's go by what the Founding Fathers said!

XXVII Michael Hastings

XXVII    Michael Hastings



Your drivel in the Rolling Stone sure sucks.
A bunch of biased crap at any rate.
Just twaddle for the Holleywood dumbclucks.
You didn't get your mind, or driving, straight!

A freedom-loving general you berate
Because he had the courage not to pass
Confiding that Obama's not so great
As he would have us think: The useless ass.

We've never had a president so crass,
Yet fools like you did trumpet his success
In burying our freedoms 'neath the grass,
And leaving our great country in a mess.

Obama stripped him of his high command:
He must have been a patriot quite grand!

XXVI Richard Ramirez

XXVI    Richard Ramirez


On death row, twenty-three long years lived he,
While Shumer, Feinstein, and late Lautenberg
Attempted to disarm both you and me;
So we could not be safe against this turd.

The LA Times put out the printed word
That citizens with guns were dang'rous fools.
Two death-row decades yielded to a third
While Feinstein honed her Saul Alynsky tools.

Your freedom constipates these bitter fools.
The Constitution keeps libs up at night.
It's not just elephants against the mules;
It's about the goddam Bill of Rights!

Mass murderers cannot be put to death.
Your carry permit?  Do not hold your breath.

XXV Frank Lautenberg

XXV    Frank Lautenberg



What did you miss in World War Two, blind fool?
What made you want to take away our guns?
Is that what asses learn at "liberal school"?
The governance that free republic shuns?

You bought elections using your own funds;
Trick amendments you produced by score;
But your amendments weren't the proper ones!
You're an anti-2nd amendment whore!

If you want peace, you'd best prepare for war;
Protecting freedom's what we want to do.
So go and have a cry with Michael Moore.
We arm ourselves, fearing the likes of you!

No more will you drink from the public trough.
That was pneumonia, Frank, not just a cough.

XXIV Wali-ur-Rehman Mehsud

XXIV    Wali-ur-Rehman Mehsud



So!  Vengeance on the U.S. you will wreak;
A greater "hit" than nine-one-one, you say!
That sounds to me like strong AlQeada speak.
But you are Taliban.  That's not their way.

A drone has fortunately saved the day.
Six friends and you now lifted from the board.
Harass the NATO convoy and you pay.
Benazir Bhutto's ghost now holds the sword.

Your fundamental view of Islam's word
Is raining C-4 on you from the sky.
The bottom line is that you're just a turd.
You're dead now.  No one even wonders why.

Hey Wali!  I think Allah's on the phone.
I hear the distant buzzing of a drone.

XXIII Haynes Johnson

XXIII    Haynes Johnson



You wrote "Sleepwalking" through the Reagan years.
I have to say, your logic's pretty bad!
He mitigated all our cold war fears.
He was the best prez that we've ever had!

Our situation now is very sad.
If Axelrod likes you, then you must suck!
The re-election likely made you glad.
Now you and we are running out of luck.

Your heroes have us flailing in the muck;
We wish that we had Reagan back on top.
With all the trraitors, liberty is stuck.
We want this hopey-changey thing to stop!

For all your stupid "I love Clinton" talk--
You sleep the long sleep.  We'll go for a walk.

XXII Billie Sol Estes

XXII  Billie Sol Estes



He was a friend of LBJ.  Immune
From prosecutors thwarting all his dreams.
He conned the rich investors with his tune,
And Lyndon learned, from him, of Ponzi schemes.

Ammonia tanks and farming were his themes.
More money meant more ladies for his bed.
But Lyn was saddled with Vietnam memes.
"I come to you with heavy heart," he said.

And so the Great Society was led
In, from the frayed and soggy Marxist book.
Distraction from the war!  Keep people fed!
And leave the founding fathers on the hook.

Now, forty years beyond this Ponzi start.
Obama's stake has pierced our country's heart!

XXI Mary Thom

XXI    Mary Thom



I read your liberal rag today, my dear.
It seems Rush Limbaugh called a whore a whore.
This war on women thing, to me, seems queer;
Ergo, I just don't buy it anymore!

In fact, I think that there's another war;
Divisive hate-speech coming from the left:
Obama and both Clintons and Al Gore
Have left my native homeland quite bereft.

Co-opting feminism was quite deft.
The in-your-face gay movement fanned the flames;
Ensuing was bankrupting moral theft
Ensnaring girls within your sick mind-games.

So don't show me that crappy Sandra Fluke.
Promoting sluthood makes REAL women puke!

XX Al Neuharth

XX    Al Neuharth



For twenty years the USA Today
Has low'red the bar and published tritely trash,
An echo-chamber for the commie way.
Another outlet for the biased hash.

We know you only did it for the cash,
But now you're dead, so was it worth the time?
With no more patriots for you to slash,
A mere accomplice to the commie crime.

It hurts us that you did it on our dime.
You could have chose a much more lofty path
Than 'gurgitating all that socialist chyme
And facing, in the afterlife, God's wrath!

The USA Today is just a rag;
A yellow journal, tossed in plastic bag.

XIX Tamerian Tsarmaev

XIX    Tamerian Tsarmaev



How did it feel as you lay all askew;
A dozen fibbie bullets in your gut,
And your dear brother driving over you,
Leaving you to die; some sort of nut?

You charged the cops, fool!  Did you hope to strut
Right past the Feds and flip it in their face?
You might have got some slack had you not put
A satchel bomb at Boston's sacred race!

You hoped to disappear without a trace;
The execution of the cop--no help!
And now you've found that quiet eternal place;
A just desert for such a lawless whelp!

You would have done far better taking meds
Than throwing IED'S at all the Feds.

XVIII Hamid al-Radmi

XVIII  Hamid al-Radmi



We've got a president who's on your side.
He'd like you to succeed.  To tear us down.
So why was it so hard for you to hide?
A simple missile from a drone!  You clown!

You were not an al Quaeda of renown,
So why this presidential killing spree?
Your death may have been just a dressing gown!
Is it to polish Barry's legacy?

It's true you didn't have much time to flee.
Four hundred milliseconds is not long.
Four of your comrades died with you, you see.
I'm sure they loved the chance to tag along.

Opposing liberty, with death you flirt.
Another brainwashed Muslim bites the dirt.

XVII Roger Ebert

XVII    Roger Ebert

Hey Roger!  What implored you 'ere to think
That movie stars could give us good advice?
Their whorish lives are always near the brink.
When faced with choices, they just roll the dice.

Their views and politics are not so nice
When platitudes of hate, they rant and yell;
Promoting failing leaders once--then twice,
Habituated to corruption's smell.

You wanted Michael Moore to "give them hell."
He's at the hors d'ouerves table, don't you see?
Is that his face or rectum?  Who could tell?
He's working on his second pound of brie!

Your annual citations of the best
Did not even include the Cuckoo's Nest!

XVI Dan Turner

XVI     Dan Turner

"There's nothing like a massacre," I wrote,
"To send those Mausers flying from the store."
But now I see that I have been the goat.
Big O's election sold them all, and more!

The '08 guns and ammo buying war
Did follow the election of this fool.
More guns per capita for rich and poor.
Defense against his 2012 renewal.

And if you pack your daughter off to school,
Make sure she has a Taurus in her purse.
The Secret Service won't protect your jewel.
Just like the poor ambassador, or worse!

Just one more seat upon the highest court;
Your wife and daughters' safety he will thwart.

XV Anthony Lewis

XV    Anthony Lewis



He was the second president impeached,
And I defended him with all my might.
We knew that it was B S that he preached.
What did I care that my facts were not right?

She was a master thief and somewhat bright,
But she got sloppy or just didn't care.
I lied for her in that Whitewater fight,
And then she stole Air Force One's silverware!

Although deathbed conversions are quite rare,
I understand I threw away my prize.
So my hypocrisy, God has laid bare.
Protecting those two scumbags with my lies.

Said Henry Kissinger, "He's always wrong!"
Ken Starr was right!  That's how I'll end my song.

XIV Hugo Chavez

XIV     Hugo Chavez



Methinks the smell of sulfur's in the air!
Dang!  He just laughed and smiled a while ago.
A testament to Cuban medicare.
Now Hugo's cleared to vote in Chicago.

Fidel and Danny Glover; Rosie-O'
Won't join with him, the U. S. to berate,
And Ollie Stone is all wept out you know.
A press release from Bush:  "Hugo!  Checkmate!"

No more will this despotic reprobate
Be babbling on TV for all it's worth.
"New constitution he'll initiate..."
Eh?  Sound familiar, suckahs to the north?

Insulting hypocrite!  He sure had gall!
I wonder if Sean Penn will bear his pall.

XIII Mary J Corey

XIII     Mary J Corey



The politicians hack so furious!
Not likely that the facts will soon emerge.
I never took it all that serious.
I should have fought against that tribal urge.

One side's faux pauxs, endeavoring to purge,
We railed about the forty-some percent,
Instead of making "open mike" the scourge.
To smoke and mirrors, our attentions went.

I quite regret now,all the time we spent
To play class warfare on that poor old goat.
Obama turned out not quite heaven-sent.
Could I go back?  I'd like to change my vote!

Alive again, my heart would surely break,
As you sleep in the bed I helped to make.

XII Mark Saylor

XII     Mark Saylor



Behold us, comrades!  We're the L. A. Times.
To spike a story is not such a sin.
We lose our voices.  Just a bunch of mimes.
We'll write of Lindsay Lohan drinking gin.

There has to be some kind of left hand spin.
Let's find out what Madonna has to say.
Now, only commie candidates must win,
So we'll report and we'll decide today.

Just think about which nasty card to play.
Ignore the right unless they're behind bars.
If it's not true just write it anyway!
And give ourselves awards.  Just like the stars!

A tumor grows in our collective brain.
So grab your pen and board the gravy train.

XI Lou Parajos

XI     Lou Parajos




The highest rate of crime in fifty states;
The highest rate of AIDS in all the land;
Blood draining down the city's gutter grates.
Is that a large size cola in your hand?

You can't go on a walk as you had planned,
But you can get a cab for sixty bucks.
Is not the culture of our city grand?
Let's do some PCP and hijack trucks.

Let's face it!  Our idyllic set-up sucks.
We thought you only needed Schumer's views.
You don't deserve this media of clucks.
Oh, what a hopeless rag, the Daily News.

All that our fathers built, of great renown,
Our papers and their lackeys have brought down.

X Jimmy Lee Dyckes

X     Jimmy Lee Dyckes



A maniac went quite berserk today,
And killed a school-bus driver in his bus.
The newsmen wished to blame the NRA,
George Bush, Rush Limbaugh, and the rest of us.

A boy was hostage but they made no fuss.
For the feds they waited patiently.
Perhaps he'd kill more people in his lust.
A gun grab!  By executive decree!

Before they hung it all on you and me,
Before Joe Biden even found his mouth,
The local SWAT boys shot the SOB.
That's how they git 'er done down in the South.

That killer gave a small boy quite a fright.
Those 'Bama good ol' boys--they did all right.

IX Cardiss Collins

IX     Cardiss Collins



A question, as I died, God asked with wrath.
"Is it not wrong to pass a law to scorn
The hanging of a murderous sociopath,
But allow the killing of a babe, half-born?"

The fabric of the welfare state is torn.
I surely thought food stamps would set them free.
My people now have nothing left to mourn;
Trapped in this government dependency.

Duped by the leaders of the DNC,
I worked to get the health care package through.
Too late, as I lay stricken, now I see
We didn't get a cursed thing!  Nor you!

"What have you done," asked He, "to help your race?"
I bit my lip and slowly hid my face.

VIII Arlene Ackermann

VIII     Arlene Ackermann



I started in D.C.  It was no breeze.
The head of all their schools.  I cut my teeth
On gangsters, sluts, and rapper wanna-be's.
With little brain pow'r lurking underneath.

Then, on to Frisco I was sent.  Good grief!
One hundred sevn'ty thousand I desired.
I had to sue.  They called me a damn thief!
'Twas severance pay.  Hah!  I could not be fired!

So Philly was the next bunch I inspired.
A five-year commie plan, their funds to drain.
They paid a million bucks if I'd retire.
And then I filed an unemployment claim!

My excellence, Obama recognized.
I was a brassy crook.  He was surprised!

VII Ed Koch

VII     Ed Koch



Iconic mayor of a city-state.
"Punch me; I'll punch you back," he used to say.
Oh!  Yesterday he joined the gun debate.
"Take all their guns!  Yes!  Ban them all today!"

This hipocrite had few cards left to play
But always wants inclusion in the news.
He rose up from his near-death bed.  Oy Vey!
To spew out, once again, his leftist views.

We used to think he cared about the Jews.
An anti-Semite prez he then endorsed.
No one's exempt from payment of his dues.
At last!  By failing heart!  His silence, forced!

You can't spell "dunce" without a DNC.
Don't foist your statist fascism on me.

VI Said Ali al-Shihri

VI
Said Ali al-Shihri



They penned me up in Gitmo for six years,
For nine-eleven and al Qaeda ties.
Their supreme court responded to my tears
(I filled them to the brim with smoke and lies!)

Then I, back with my jihad, gave more tries
And called Somali pirates to attack,
Helped cause the murdered missionaries' cries,
And all the while the Saudis watched my back.

The Yemens cut me quite a bit of slack.
Reported killed, they deemed to set me free.
I voted absentee for ol' Barack,
Then mocked you all on CNN TV!

Just this past week an air strike did me in.
Don't be too sure!  I might fool you again!

V Ted Talbert

V     Ted Talbert



Ah, poor Detroit!  The city that I loved!
The people in the streets have lost their dream.
Mere mem'ries of Joe Lewis, golden-gloved.
Sometimes you have to take one for the team.

At least that's how the politicians scheme,
But it's ne'er they whom have to take the bow.
The Roman column coronation theme
Impressed, but look who's paying for it now.

Extracting all the pork from one fat sow
Appears the politicians' only art.
So pay your union dues behind their plow.
I did and now it stopped (and broke) my heart.

'Ere all I learned in journalism school,
I gave a bomber jacket to a fool.

IV Robert Citron

IV     Robert Citron



They should've voted for that Moorlach guy,
But Bobby had his day beneath the sun.
Well, now he's died, and no one cares just why.
Eight billion bucks in Orange County funds!

A bankruptcy is what our hero won,
With interest-rate derivatives his plan,
And Golden-state taxpayers had no fun,
When Bobby went off, handcuffed, in the van.

Do not despair.  He's not the only man
To tax and spend and tax.  It's tried and true!
That self-important California clan
Has got the same plan for the rest of you!

While chasing down the California dream,
He broke his neighbors.  In a Ponzi scheme.

III Prospero Gallinari

III     Prospero Gallinari



Unlike Barack and pinhead Hillary,
Who strive to bring Marx in through your back door,
The Red Brigade!  A perfect match for me!
Italian-style!  An overt terror war!

Kidnapping Premier Moro from his car,
And, later, General Dozier as well,
Endeavoring to replace them with a czar,
We paid the mortgage for our place in Hell.

In nineteen seven nine, the truth to tell,
As we were chuckling--switching license tags,
The cops emerged and shot me up real well.
Now finally I've died, in prison rags.

We can account for fourteen thousand dead,
In what we aptly named "the years of lead."

II Maulvi Nazir

II     Maulvi Nazir



What better way to start out the new year,
Than letting loose a piercing rebel yell,
And dropping some C-4 upon Nazir,
Thus adding to the residents of Hell?

Ten thousand went to mourn and lived to tell!
"So see?  We're not so bad!"  I have to say.
How many kids saw polio's death knell?
So let ol' Maulvi have just one bad day.

The mullas have a different way to pray,
A host of virgins waiting for their cheer.
How odd, refining opium that way,
Whilst holding great objection toward lite beer!

A drone was buzzing quietly overhead.
A Taliban extremist is now dead.

I Enrique Otulski

I     Enrique Otulski

To put Fidel in place I worked with Che',
Deposing old Batista in his prime.
My one reward was "Head of Fisheries"
"E'en though I pledged to him my whole lifetime.

Whilst Che' was executed for his crimes,
A commie island, Cuba, we did make.
To squeeze from them last peso and last dime
We broke the poor cane workers we'd forsaked.

So sugar and cigars were our big break.
The Russian nukes we nearly brought to bear!
The stand by JFK was just a fake.
We missed our putrid goal by just a hair.

And now Fidel is sick and I am dead.
Red visions no more dancing in my head.